Technology Ruins Life's Guessing Games

If "video killed the radio star" then smart phones are killing the music discussion.

A few weeks ago my husband, brother-in-law and his wife were sitting around a campfire in Northern Ontario. It was a beautiful night and much wine had been consumed. We were listening to Queen and the topic of Freddy Mercury's untimely death came up. We spent a mere 60 seconds trying to figure out how many years passed between Queen's first album and Mercury's passing. That's when one of us pulled out a BlackBerry, googled the question and read the answer verbatim from wikipedia, killing the conversation and effectively silencing the debate. Had this discussion taken place ten years ago, we might have passed an hour arguing about the year that Queen appeared on the music charts, sharing our recollection of how old we were and what was happening in our lives. The discussion would no doubt have included some unexpected revelations and surprises.

Later that same weekend, we were watching The Big Lebowski. Somewhere in the middle of the movie the Jeff Bridges character is experiencing a drug-induced trip after being poisoned. I mentioned to my husband that the soundtrack reminded me of a Kenny Rogers tune I used to know in another lifetime. He didn't believe me, but before I had a chance to defend myself, he whipped out his i-Phone and, thanks to Shazam, he was able to grudgingly confirm that I was right. Of course, that wasn't the point. Hearing the song had awoken a memory after almost three decades. As an adolescent I had a good friend whose mom idolized Kenny Rogers and played his records constantly to the point that I can sing along with all of his songs. In the years that followed my friend's family was shattered by some horrible secrets, she moved away and I lost track of her. But for those few years, playing Barbies in her basement, listening to country music, life was good. Of course, I never really got to share that story because, as with the Queen incident, technology had ruined the moment.

It's great that we no longer have to wait more than a few seconds to get the answer to life's pressing questions but the thing is, it's not really the answer that matters, it's the stories conjured up by the trip down memory lane that makes these debates fun. I don't know if technology makes us dumber or lazier but I venture it makes us less interesting.

Technology Etiquette - Confusion Reigns

Several months ago I attended a seminar with a junior colleague of mine. There were about 40 people in attendance, including some of our firm's clients. About five minutes into the talk, my colleague, who was sitting a few seats away from me, got out his handheld device and tapped the keys furiously for about two minutes, then put it down. A moment later, he did the same thing and continued thus for the duration of the seminar.

Needless to say, I was mortified. I was not the only one who noticed him doing this and in fact, several of our clients were glaring at him openly. I couldn't believe he was text-messaging a friend during a seminar, and one organized by clients no less. As we left, I mentioned that there is an expectation that we put our cell phones and Blackberries away while someone is talking and it's inappropriate to check e-mails or send text messages during a presentation. He looked at me incredulously and, with more than a hit of condescension, said: "I wasn't texting. I was taking notes, the modern way". Boy, did I feel ancient.

Today, my business partner Martin Waxman, who is attending a PR conference in Vancouver, said he was one of few people live-tweeting the morning session. I suggested that maybe his fellow attendees didn't want to give the impression that they weren't paying attention.

Each of these anecdotes raise an important question about technology etiquette. While it has long been accepted that a speaker, any speaker, deserves the courtesy of your full attention, where does tweeting come into the mix? And if you prefer to tap out your conference notes rather than use a pen and paper, how do you let people know that's what you are doing?

In matters of etiquette, the golden rule is to move through life's situations with a sensitive awareness of the feelings of others. What's important in a meeting or conference situation then, is to gauge the environment as you walk in. If you're in a small meeting of senior colleagues and clients, all of whom have turned off their cell phones, then you will most likely offend by choosing to use yours in front of them. If, however, you're at a panel discussion on how to tweet with style, then chances are, you will be one of many who tweet while they listen. The point is to learn to "read" each situation and act accordingly. Personally, I prefer to focus on what people are saying, digest it and share later, but that's just me.
If you're hosting a meeting or presenting a seminar, do everyone a favour and explain the code of conduct at the beginning. If you prefer not to be interupted by ringing cell phones and beeping handhelds, politely request that everyone turn their cell phones off at the beginning. They may not heed your request, but at least it will be out there. Build e-mail and voicemail breaks into the schedule and let people know when they are. If you're comfortable with guests tweeting your words of wisdom, then give them permission at the start. By You'll put everyone at ease and remove confusion and judgement.

One more thing. If you are one of those who takes electronic notes or tweets during conferences, keep it to that please. Don't use it as an excuse to multi-task by responding to e-mails. That's just rude!