Why our elected officials should apologize more

A couple of years ago, I wrote a blog post on the importance of saying "sorry" when you're in the wrong.  The need to apologize exists whether you are totally responsible for a debacle, or if you own only a small part of it.  Some jurisdictions have even instituted apology legislation, which means saying sorry cannot be used as a confession in legal situations.  This accommodates the human need to see an appropriate level of atonement and accountability in order to start the healing process, rebuild trust and move forward after a disaster.


I realize that finding politicians who don't take responsibility for their actions is like shooting fish in a barrel but there's a situation unfolding in Ontario right now which has truly taken blame-slinging to a disgusting new low.  In short, the Toronto Star recently revealed outrageous spending irregularities at ORNGE, the province's publicly-funded air ambulance service and the ensuing investigation has unearthed a laundry list of questionable practices including the use of taxpayer dollars to renovate a high-end office building, establish a complex web of shell companies to shield itself from government scrutiny, send executives to foreign schools for expensive MBAs, loan the CEO $1.2 million for a house purchase and much more.  After a forensic audit, $25 million of taxpayer funds is still unaccounted for so the Ontario Provincial Police has been called in to investigate.


It's painfully clear that the Ministry of Health, which oversees ORNGE, was asleep at the switch and even when warned about potential problems, chose to ignore the evidence.  Now that the truth is out and the police are involved, many are calling for the Minister of Health, Deb Matthews, to resign.  She has refused which is typical, but more astoundingly, has yet to take even a shred of accountability for letting this happen on her watch.  Consider her statements:


"There's lots of blame to go around"
"People who chose to take money out of the pockets of taxpayers"
"You can't legislate trust"
"We were misled"
"I am sickened when I see people who were in a position of trust, abuse that trust"


If she was using these statements to talk about her role, however detached, in the debacle, the words would be appropriate but sadly, she is not.  She has used them, and countless others, to deflect blame away from herself and her team. In a rare turn for a politician, she has also claimed that she inherited the mess from her predecessor, a fellow Liberal who actually set up the controversial air ambulance service.  When confronted with this, his refusal to take accountability was even more profound.  Among his quotations:


"I feel like I have been scapegoated"
"It's just too convenient to lay the blame at the feet of politicians"
"the system is always set up to throw politicians under the bus"


While it's true that the Ministry of Health is huge, has thousands of employees and myriad sub-committees and spin-offs, the reality is, the buck stops with the person in charge. I ran a business for ten years and even though it was much smaller than our Ministry of Health with its thousands of employees and myriad spin-offs, I was not always able to oversee every decision.  As a result, sometimes mistakes were made and clients were disappointed.  But, as an owner of the company, I understood that ultimately I was in charge and it was my role to apologize, even if the entire transgression had gone on without my knowledge.  While you can choose to privately reprimand employees who breach organizational ethics or just plain screw up, it's unacceptable to publicly blame someone else when a program you are responsible for, goes awry.


No one expects perfection from elected officials but everyone expects at least a show of contrition.  That provides a starting point for moving forward and rebuilding trust.


If Deb Matthews hopes to emerge from this relatively unscathed (and it may be too late), she needs to make a simple statement along the lines of, "While I cannot oversee every single thing that happens in my portfolio, I'm sorry for the role I played in this and I hope you'll have faith in me as we work to clean up this mess."  Is that so impossible to consider?


I have never been involved in politics, I'm not affiliated with any of our political parties and this blog post is not an attack on the Liberal party.  So, I'm not aware of the popular theory on how these scandals should be handled but I'm wondering if there's a "never apologize under any conditions" ethos that exists among political advisers and if so, it needs to go.

Beware portable office creep

Last night I visited Toronto's biggest shopping mall to buy an outfit for an upcoming special event. Let it be said that the last week of January is ,without a doubt, the saddest and most unproductive time of the year to shop for apparel. At store after store the offerings comprised leftover Boxing Day sales and a few pieces of "cruisewear" but that's another story.

The reason the shopping trip made its way into my etiquette blog is something unusual I witnessed at the mall. A particularly spacious part of the facility features oversized leather benches, which are quite comfortable by mall standards. One of these benches was completely covered by the various acoutriments of a gentleman who had decided that a busy shopping centre was the ideal place to establish a portable office.

He was tapping away on a laptop computer which was plugged into an outlet underneath the bench. In addition he had a BlackBerry connected to the computer, a massive leather briefcase open and lying on its side with its contents spilling out precariously, manilla folders stuffed with paperwork, loose pieces of paper, pens, notebooks, a bulky winter overcoat and an MP3 player. When I came upon him, he was having a conversation on a cell phone separate from the one which was charging in the computer.

Almost every inch of the bench was covered with his stuff and he was completely unperturbed by the admonishing looks of passersby (myself included). While this is the first time I've seen someone set up shop in a mall (pun intended), I've been noticing a trend towards people working in coffee shops, libraries and other public spaces, perhaps a casualty of the economic downturn.

I have no issue with the portable office concept. Technology has liberated us from the traditional work space and, with enough bandwidth, we can conduct business from anywhere. Add an expresso frapuccino and some jazz music and you're all set. Ernest Hemingway wrote The Sun Also Rises in some of Paris' finest and dingiest establishments.

Of course Hemingway didn't have to wrestle with electronic etiquette. In today's world, the portable employee needs to remember that they're not in their own home, office or home office and as such, be mindful of others with whom they share the space - people who are trying to relax, shop or just buy coffee. As always with etiquette, the golden rule is to always keep in mind the comfort level of others. Herewith, the five commandments of the portable office:

1. Thou shalt not leave your computer cables and wires snaking all over the floor for unsuspecting customers to trip over.
2. Thou shalt not take a table for four if you are a party of one. Your briefcase does not count as a person.
3. Thou shalt not conduct loud business calls meant for the privacy of a real office. No one else wants to hear about your plans to overthrow the global widget industry.
4. Thou shalt turn your cell phone ringer to vibrate. I'm sure you love Beyonce but maybe other guests would rather not listen to a tinny rendition of Crazy In Love while you use the washroom.
5. Thou shalt not buy one coffee and stay all day. That's just rude!

Sorry seems to be the hardest word

I am the proud mother of two toddlers who run to greet me at the door when I get home from work (amazing). Last night, they were both bursting to tell me different versions of the same story. One was sporting a blood-spattered shirt which he had refused to remove before I got home due to the pivotal role it played as a prop in the telling of the story. The other had a distinctly guilty look on his otherwise cherubic face.
My eldest (he of the bloody shirt) launched into the tale of how earlier in the day, they had an argument over a toy which culminated in his younger brother (holder of the coveted toy) into his brother's nose and causing it to bleed. When he was finished, my youngest, the perpetrator looked at me and said: "Well at least I said sorry".

Raising young children provides ample opportunity to teach the seven words of good manners: please, thank you, excuse me and, I'm sorry. We all have these phrases drummed into us as youngsters but when we grow up and make our way into the business world, some of these words become politicized, with meanings and inuendo attached that were never part of the original intention. In the workplace we often hear: "I don't want to say (insert word) because it could be implied as (insert undesired effect here)"

I came across an example of this in a recent news story. A hospital in Winnipeg is adopting a new approach to dealing with errors that take place in the operating room - apologizing to patients. In the case of a senior citizen who experienced pain after a pair of four-inch forceps were left in her abdominal cavity, the surgeon who performed the procedure apologized and hospital staff followed up with their own apology.

One wonders what our world has come to when it is national news that a person who has been wronged receives an apology from the wrongdoer. But those of us in a corporate setting are all too familiar with the legal landmines of the public apology. Malpractice lawyers and company legal departments caution that an apology is as good as an admission of guilt and can open the floodgates for costly lawsuits and class actions.

The Winnipeg Regional Health Authority's decision to issue apologies comes on the heels of new research revealing that patients are actually less likely to sue if they are provided with full disclosure and an apology when issues come to light. In fact, several Canadian provinces and U.S. states have recently passed apology legislation to ensure that any apology offered to patients cannot be used against the health profession in a legal action.

In the story, John Cowell, chief executive officer of the Health Quality Council of Alberta sums up what etiquette advocates have long known: "When you are open and honest, the chance of being sued drops way off." While most of us won't face lawsuits as a result of our daily mistakes and misjudgements, we can easily minimize the fallout by apologizing - quickly and cleanly.

Two words, "I'm sorry", uttered immediately after an infraction, can stop a firestorm in its tracks. When a mistake has been made and there is no apology or visible attempt to take responsibility, things start to simmer, resentment builds and what could have been solved by a simple apology weeks ago is now a level-four crisis.

No matter what their complaint, people need to be acknowledged and they need to be heard. Often that is enough to diffuse a potential crisis.

Now class, who can remember the seven words of good manners?